Think You Can Top These?

Following are actual excuses that landlords have received for not paying the rent.

"I apologize; in an absent minded moment (and I have had plenty lately), I mailed 3/4 of my bills last month without stamps. I'm not even sure if they're the correct stamps. I hope I can get my act together next month! I'm also sorry I haven't called you. I don't get home from work until after 8 and it’s usually closer to 11."

"I can't even sleep. My dogs are keeping half the neighborhood up every night. How am I supposed to keep a job if I can't sleep?"

"I just found out you own this house free and clear! You've been profiting off me all this time?!"

"My previous landlord found me. He made me make a payment towards my balance."

"Do you co-operate with credit counseling to lower my monthly payment?"

"Carl got arrested and moved out. I hope you don't expect me to pay his share too."

"I had this nightmare... This house is giving me a bad feeling. I think it's haunted."

"I've been trying to call you all day so you can come and pick up the rent monies, but there was no answer so I spent it."

"My husband accidentally dropped a lotion bottle in the toilet. He and the plumber had the toilet on the front lawn until my husband, who is a chef, got out the bottle with his long fork. So we paid a plumber $135 to have a chef fix the toilet."

"We ran out of blue envelopes."

"I don't have the rent money, but I ordered a pizza to be delivered to your family."

"I didn't get my child support check and I think your former tenant stole it. I would like to have the mailboxes moved inside the building."

"My wife's mother is sick, and if she dies, I'll have it all next week."

"A car hit the house and made our food go bad."

"The mailbox is broken."

Even if this not-so-wonderful situation has occurred in your life, I still hope you can have a chuckle at these. Do you think you can top these? Post, and we'll find out!

--AdviserToTheAdvisers